Equally important: will find nice sensible boyfriend and stop forming romantic attachments to any of the following: alcoholics, workaholics, sexaholics, commitment-phobics, peeping toms, megalomaniacs, emotional fuckwits, or perverts.
i'm thankful i've only had to deal with the alcoholics, commitment-phobics and emotional fuckwits. i'd like to get a handle on this before a megalomanic finds his way into my life.
because of the being single being a good and positive thing (under no other circumstances am i as nice to myself and as happy as when i'm not trying to deal with the emotional fuckwittery that comes with another person) i thought instead i might talk about my wonderful friends, and why it is that i was attracted to them (in a friendy way... mostly) in the first place.
i say mostly a friendy type of attraction because i have a theory that we all have slight sparks of attraction to our friends, be it physically, emotionally, spiritually, intellectually. this is a good thing and makes for exciting friendships where you're always happy to see each other. well, that and i prefer goodlooking people. this may be discriminatory to an extent (although my concept of what constitutes goodlooking is not typical by any means), but whatever, i'm nice to everyone, even when i think they're ugly and stupid. i think that's fair.
the kind of person that attracts me is a person who knows themselves. in younger adult life, it seems like a bit of a mire of muddy egotistical insecurity, as far as friends go. everyone is trying to prove themselves to everyone else. at some point though, the miracle occurs, and they realise they really only have to prove themselves to themselves, and be happy with that. once this miracle has taken place, it's very rare that the happy ones will tread on your personage anymore. rather, they walk alongside you and are proud to share your victories and defeats, laugh at your silliness, tell you stories about themselves to make you realise you're not the only daggy person in the house. take note that these people don't seem to require constant reassurance, and only check in occasionally to make sure they're not losing the plot, for example, "i'm not the only one who distrusts magpies, right?".
the kind of person that attracts me is also very good with banter. quips and puns and punchlines. i tend to quite enjoy people who have opinions but don't take themselves too seriously, are upfront with any agenda they might have, read books, randomly bring baked goods into my life, are capable of serious conversation.
i'm attracted to happiness, of the quiet and sure kind. i don't like too much loud sparkling though, or being told to smile. actually i fucking hate being told to smile or cheer up. obviously, seeing i'm generally a happy type, if i look visibly not happy something is up. either that or i just have bitchy resting face.
i'm attracted to generosity; generosity with time, afore-mentioned baked goods, jokes, compliments, other friends, kind thoughts.
basically, i just like people who are awesome, but haven't had to work really hard on appearing that way.
and that is what i know.
|I am not attracted to evil snails. Not ever. Not even if there was a fire.|