secrets: rainy days

Single friends: Is it just me, or do rainy days make you wish you had someone to stay in bed with all day for sex and movies?

Actually, for me right now in the middle of my musical renaissance, it would be sex and songwriting. Or songwriting and sex.

A girl can dream.

30pictureschallenge: Day 10

I've never been very good at sharing a bed. That seems to me to be one of the crappy parts of being an adult, that you have to share your bed with someone who might steal your covers away, or sleep in a star shape while you struggle to hold in to your little bit of space.

Because I have so much trouble with sleeping, I am pretty damn particular about such things. Amongst the many wonderful things of singledom is the wonderful thing of having my bed to myself. 

I took this photo of the magical space that is the bed in the back of my awesome van, Maude the Mazda. On account of the amount of whiskey I needed to drink to deal with Tony Abbott becoming Australia's Prime Minister, I was unable to drive home on election night (this wasn't an accidental thing, let the record show). I parked my lovely Maudie outside Paddy's house on a flat spot and had a little sleepover. 

I'd recently added a few important elements to the bed- the multicoloured rug was a score from an op-shop, as was the lacy pillowslip. It is my intention to furnish Maude with floral sheets as soon as possible, and maybe a little spot to secure my book, notepad and pen so they do not disappear into the bedding.

That bed is one of my particular favourites. In the morning, the sun comes through the pink curtains and gives everything that rose-coloured wonder that on this particular morning was quite perpendicular to the Australian political situation. When you awake, well-rested despite (or perhaps due to) the amount of whiskey imbibed, and you are in a warm rosy world, you are able to feel a little joy in your heart. Fact.

#30daychallenge day 1: my current relationship/singledom

my current relationship is with myself. i've been single since feb 14 this year (if you're going to breakup, why not do it on valentine's day?) and have gradually eased back into the comfiness of singledom.

this time round, i know all about how it goes, this singledom. i know that i have a huge list of activities which tend to fall by the wayside when there's a boy on the scene; activities i love to do and get a lot out of. i know i have a pile of great friends with whom i can surround myself (or not) at will. i know how much i like my own company - whether reading, going to movies, writing or just sitting about, i'm happy and comfortable and in fact often prefer these things on my own. i also know i have awesome family close by, be it my mum who i see in the carpark almost every workday, or my cousin and his wife who i hadn't seen for 6 months (they'd in fact had a whole baby since i saw them last).

i am a lucky motherfucker.

there's been an interesting shift this time, and i don't know if it's my age, or the very fact of being beaten over the head by yet another incorrectly-placed stint of optimism and trust, but i am not going to be rushing into anything serious for no good reason, if there should come a time when someone has expressed an interest. broken down: i shall not be dating anymore boys. men, please.

that's not to say i won't happily be set up on a date or three, but you know, i'm not keen on wasting my time on time-wasters. ain't nobody got time for that.

and all the activities i can do now, as a single lady, are my favourites. activities! free time!

the world is open and full of possibility.

and next year, i'm going to sweden.

secret: the start of the list

some things on my list- are they so much to ask?

someone who gets it

Someone who laughs at/with me

Someone who can read

Just what it says on the box

Someone who makes me laugh

Someone who makes creations for me, including paper flowers

Someone who's ok with their sensitive side/can knit scarves

Someone who makes my heart go all giddy and ridiculous

Someone who can Adventure

Someone who can make a bit of conversation

day 20. someone you see yourself being with/marrying in the future

i may be single for the rest of my life, but if by some freak accident i'm not, i would accept someone who meets the following requirements:

just kidding.

whoever i end up with, and i'll be surprised if i marry them but who knows, they will somehow find me charming. despite everything. all this.

they will, obviously, have a sense of humour. otherwise we'll never last.

failing all these options i will marry chace crawford, no worries.

an observation

maybe being in a relationship is not so great.

all recent emo-ness aside, i can't help but consider the fact that at least i don't have to have arguments with someone, the kind of arguments that two entirely different people have when they decide, for some bizarre reason, to commit to each other rather than anyone else.

even the most perfect couples fight, because it is human nature. i think it's more how you deal with the fighting, how you react to it and how you move past it, that marks what sort of a couple you are.

being in a relationship is constant negotiation. and requires constant compassion. and sometimes it is just about taking a really deep breath before you say something small, poisonous and mean. at least, that's my experience. because i am a snarky individual when i want to be.

it's the being in love, and the heartbreaking fun of it all, that's the bit i miss. the practical, pay-the-bills-on-time, take-the-garbage-out, it's-your-turn-to-do-the-dishes stuff, that bit i do not miss. although a certain level of comfort can be found in this very level of domesticity.

is it fair to blame hollywood for the myth of romance? please can i blame them? fuckers.

i think the only way to keep magic happening is not to live with your lover. ever. this is a theory i am working on, but judging on my luck lately, i will never ever be able to test this theory out again...

there, emo, BAM, right in your eye!