secret: sucked into a little black cloud

despite the bluebird day, and the person who donated candy at work, i just got home and i feel that damn black cloud over me...

i'm tired. i'm poor. i'm meant to be going out to dinner and i can't afford it, and i'm sure if i said so someone would pay for me, but that will make me feel worse. i was thinking some dancing might fix it, if the dancing is free of course...

i really feel like staying home, eating a baked 'tato and drinking some whiskey. but drinking alone is antisocial, and verging on alcoholic. isn't it? i don't know.

so i shall go out, and have beer for dinner, and feel all is right with the world until tomorrow morning when i am hungover and poorer and i have to work. bleah. see why i don't want to go out?

bad company as well. sigh. lucky i'm a good faker.

neither secret nor treasure: observations of the day

• boys sing falsetto with their eyes closed. why is that? i love this cover, even though it's pop, because it's a catchy song with a cute boy singing it. 

• i woke up this morning with both my ears blocked. everything has been a little off today. it makes me burrow deep into myself, and think about things i have avoided for a while. i need to go back to australia soon for a visit, figure some shit out. i don't know what i want to do or where to go next!! there is a war inside my head, because i want to stay where i am, live day by day, at peace... there is the other half saying 'you are a ski bum, make a plan, think of all the things you could be doing!'.
• i really want a haircut, but i am so defensive of my hair at the same time. it took me a long time to grow it and i love it... but i also want a fringe. i think i will ask my friend melissa to cut me one...
• i feel like i haven't done anything that classifies as "young and reckless" since Halloween. that's why i'm in whistler, right? i guess new year's eve is up and coming. time to get loose, methinks.
• i want to do an open mic night this season! richard the swede is going to make it happen, i can just tell.
• i am going riding tomorrow morning. nothing will stop me.
• i quite enjoy writing lists with dot points. makes me feel efficient.

treasure/curse: christmas crowds and tourism towns

i have used this photo before, but i love it so much. it's a christmas eve photo.

it's beginning to look a lot (fuckload) like christmas round these parts. there are enough fairy lights to run several small fairy cities. it's like whistler can't get enough. christmas on fucking steroids.

a terrible side-effect of christmas is that the village of whistler fills to the brim with damned tourists, spending their holidays here, and lining up at OUR chairlifts, taking all the good tables at OUR bars... fuckers. i had a burst of outrage tonight (internal... i don't really make scenes) at the full buses, the traffic everywhere when none of the bastards can drive... then i realized that maybe if the tourists didn't come, i wouldn't have a job. duh.

to ponder a little, if i may (and yes, i may, because it's my blog and i'll ponder if i want to), i think that north america is way bigger on christmas than australia is. is it a northern hemisphere thing? is it the white christmas factor? coz, holy crap, there is a lot of christmas in the air.

i love this time of year, but can i tell you exactly why? obviously being mostly atheist i am not really about the birth of christ. what i do like, however, is the excuse for excessive consumption of everything... foods (ham, turkey) and drinks... oh boy, what i wouldn't do to a rum and eggnogg right now. mitch and i had an pretty sweet drinking session with the rum and eggnogg the other day. he's replacing my little hugh, who i love the shit out of (that expression is just so i don't seem too gooey) but who sadly is not here to be my drinking buddy like he was last year.

so we've all got it down. i like drinking. i like it more when it's appropriate, but then, i do live in whistler, where most of us have a little bit of a problem saying no to alcohol, thus making it almost always appropriate.

but listen kids, and listen good. the reason for the season: the snow. the white stuff. that's the good shit, i waited 6 months for it and it has not failed me yet. that's the reason i really love this time of year. snowboarding, friends, apres.

all i need now is a kiss under the mistletoe, or on the chairlift...

secret: i wish ...

• i could have three beers in australia: two with my brothers, one at bar etiquette
• i had some money to buy christmas presents for my lovelies
• there were more hours in the day
• boys weren't so stupid
• that sometimes people would stop talking
• my room would tidy itself, like in mary poppins