secret: i love it when someone cooks me dinner

it is very interesting to be single. i have effectively been single for a year now (even though the exboy only gave up on the long-distance in september).

this town is basically the most impossible place to meet anyone but a onenightstand. i am not a onenightstand kind of girl.

when you're single, everything is about you. it is quite wonderful. i don't have to check with anyone about what groceries i buy. i don't have to explain myself when i spend all my money on something sparkly, resulting in having to eat potatoes for the next 2 weeks. i come home when i want, or i sleep on someone's couch instead. and nobody has any say in it.

but just now and then i think longingly of how nice it is to have someone cook dinner for you.

i would like roast lamb please.

treasure: new lovely housemates

it is fun to be out on the town for free champagne.

to dance my little heart out.

to drink a chocolate thickshake.

to live with these people who are now family.

to be collectively hungover watching the oc: the "luke's dad is gay" episode.

i love the oc. it makes the sore head slightly less sore.

secret: about how i fall in love so easily

i was out at a bar and i fell in love with 3 people.

then i came home and sat up late reading old journals.

i fall in love with everyone, and as a result feel as though i am perpetually missing out.

i blame imagination. if only i had read less books as a child, and fried more braincells with television... damn my parents and damn my wholesome country upbringing. so not only do i fall in love but i imagine and create a life for us, together, one where we take walks and kiss on chairlifts in the falling snow, and laugh at each other's jokes and share each other's sweaters.

back up a little, the guy only poured you a jug of beer because he is a bartender and that is his JOB. sigh.

what i love and want and miss right now:

• my blue knitted sweater from home that was once my dad's


• eve and yanni and staying back at bar etiquette, swaying drunkenly after hours


• my long hair that i had when i was 21


• hugh, and our unexpected significant conversations

i sort of hate and love how time makes you realise just how good things were, and you didn't even know- you never seem to know at the time, looking from the inside out.

the elaboration

i collect treasures from the secondhand store where i work.

i collect secrets, but these are incidental. sometimes i just let them flutter about in my head, like moths.

i think collecting is about holding onto things. to fill myself and my personal space and my bookshelves.

holding onto things is alright, as long as sometimes you let them go. like when you own 12 pairs of sunglasses, but alas, have only one face to wear them on.

so i'll try this blog on for size and see how it fits. the inspiration came to me at 2am this morning when i discovered indea stepsister has a blog (sometimes i read gaby's blog and i found hers that way). i like to see into other people's heads. i think maybe i would like to see into mine. from a great height.

i also collect pictures of myself i have taken with webcam. to provide evidence to myself that i am pretty in the right lighting.

the first one

i want to be someone who makes a blog.